“You never look good trying to make someone else look bad.”


“You never look good trying to make someone else look bad.”

Ten ways to help others, to help yourself:

  1. Go a full day looking straight forward as you walk, smiling at everyone you pass.
  2. Say “Hello, how are you?” before any interactions with cashiers or sales associates.
  3. Each day think about one friend, and consider ways in which they like to be appreciated. Do they like a lot of attention? Do they like very little attention? Do they like corresponding by email? Text? Chat? Do they like to be complimented on their artwork? Their career? Their personality? Their looks? Consider how different people like (or need) to be appreciated.
  4. Each day appreciate someone in this unique way. Distance it from how you like to be appreciated. It’s different.
  5. When someone is telling you a story, give them your full attention. Don’t spend the time they’re talking to think of what you’re going to say next. When they finish talking, reference something they said, and ask them a question about it. Don’t use the silence as an opportunity to talk about yourself.
  6. Tell someone something nice about someone else. “Did you know so and so is really good at their job? I’m so impressed, you should chat with them sometime!” Spread positive messages about others to foster deeper connections.
  7. Resist negative commentary. If someone is saying something negative about someone else, consider what they’re really saying about themselves. Give them the opportunity to let out their anger/sadness/fear and then shift the conversation to something more positive.
  8. Treat someone to a spontaneous coffee date, or a walk through the park. Show someone that you just want to spend time with them individually because you enjoy their company.
  9. Compliment someone – you never know what a strangers insecurities are. If you’re unsure how to compliment the opposite sex, try complimenting the same sex.
  10. Stop the habit! If you feel yourself thinking or feeling bad things about someone, get the thoughts out, write them down, and try to process why you’re feeling the way.

One Comment Add yours

  1. You are awesome, Lorelei- specifically, in offering such concrete suggestions as the above. These do go a long way towards building friendships and reducing others’ insecurities. I have no problem complimenting women and girls. As you would no doubt agree, most females can tell the difference between a compliment and a come-on.


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